By Jefferson Weaver
I’m occasionally amused and constantly grumbled at the toddler-esque hypersensitivity so rampant today. Some folks need to grow their skin a little thicker.
As wretchedly costive as I get sometimes, I am not one to tolerate random name-calling, over-the-top attacks and malicious insults toward people. I reckon I was paddled too often on the playground in nursery school to behave in such a manner. I don’t mind letting my feelings be known on nigh onto any subject. I consider the behavior of some folks to be flat-out stupid, but even the worst ones are still people, and attacking them personally is not right nor polite.
I take a certain pride in being archaic that way, although some would call me arcane.
Take, for example, the brouhaha over the billboard in Winston-Salem. It says simply: “Real men provide. Real women appreciate it,” or something on those lines.
Yet feminazis, rampantly militant homosexuals, wannebe hippies, race-baiters and people with nothing better to do have been raising sand for a week now, demanding that the sign be removed, the person who leased the sign punished, and that everyone else be beaten over the head with the opinions of the dissenting minority. Last weekend, the politically-correct protestors held their own sign contest and a counter-demonstration.
Apparently, these groups are offended at the simple concept that men who call themselves such really should provide for their families, strengthen their communities and help others. Now, the sign doesn’t say women can’t do the same – indeed, rare is the successful man (or woman) without a strong support system at home – but apparently, the protestors have developed the ability to read minds and discern hearts. Therefore, the unnamed person who paid for a legal sign to exercise a First Amendment right is a bad, ugly, poopyhead.
Pardon me for using such strong language in a family publication.
I may be anachronistic, indeed I consider that a quality personality trait, but I feel like real men do provide for their families. That doesn’t mean women can’t, or shouldn’t, if they so choose – it just means that I have a traditional, biblically-based outlook on life. You have your right to a dissenting opinion, and while we may disagree, as long as you don’t start name-calling to make your point, we can discuss things like grownups.
I am just about disgusted with this knee-jerk, government-nanny, empty-headed celebrity-defined social justice trend. Gang shaming, as some call it, is little more than organized lying for the sake of a political platform, yet it’s become a standard part of new leftist guidelines.
For instance: I don’t like boiled okra. I like fried okra, but not boiled, unless it’s in soup or gumbo.
That should be a simple enough statement that most folks, especially Southerners, can understand and one which we could potentially have a spirited debate.
Now, imagine how the harpies would react, regardless of whether or not a single one of them likes boiled okra (although I doubt most know what it is).
“Breaking news: Jefferson Weaver said he hates okra. He’s a fascist!”
“While he has only recently admitted his hatred for okra, we are trying to confirm a report that Weaver made a public statement several years ago that he hates all vegetables.” (That’s true, by the way – I was six, and loudly made the comment when Mother and Papa dragged me to a big awards banquet at Campbell University.)
“Weaver should be forced to explain why he hates vegetables,” another commentator decrees. “We have a panel here to explain how his hatred of vegetables has affected them.”
“Well, Chet, I tell you – this kind of hatred frightens me. America is no place for people who hate vegetables. I mean, look at the pictures of this man – he’s just scary!”
“I heard he told someone that hanging his picture on the barn wall would scare rats.”
“It certainly scares me! That’s something a terrorist would do!”
“Congress needs to force the terrorist Jefferson Weaver to embrace vegetables! There needs to be a law! We’re going to boycott anything he has ever liked, anywhere he has ever shopped, or anywhere he has ever gone to visit. And we’re going to use lots of exclamation points to make ourselves sound important!”
“We’re here to interview a bowl of boiled okra that Weaver hated. Well, it may not be the particular bowl, but it’s representative. And there are some lima beans and Brussels sprouts here who are suffering from post-traumatic stress due to Weaver’s hatred of vegetables.”
“I heard that he actually likes lima beans, but that can’t be confirmed.”
“That’s just misinformation spread by the right wing vegetable hate groups who endorse Weaver. We have it on good authority, from anonymous sources close to the Weaver camp, that lima beans are just a token vegetable for him. They aren’t even really vegetables, anyway. They’re legumes.”
“Does Weaver really think he can regain the public’s confidence now, having been exposed as a hater of vegetables?”
“In a ridiculously transparent attempt to seem objective, we have invited John Smith, who doesn’t like broccoli, to join our panel today. We won’t let him talk, but we will ask him questions designed to mislead our viewers and embarrass him.”
“I understand Weaver’s problems with okra, although I would never feel that way. I heard, however, that he actually likes okra in certain circumstances, such as in soup.”
“So, Weaver can’t stand the individuality of okra? That’s misogynistic! And I don’t even know what that word means!”
“That isn’t what I said. He has a right not to like boiled okra, just like anyone else. Has anyone contacted him?”
“There’s no need to ask Weaver. You’re actually going to sit there and defend hatred as a right? Everyone says Weaver is a vile hater of vegetables. Do you agree with his stand on vegetables?”
“A small, radical, uninformed, unwashed, idiotic percentage of Americans agree with Weaver’s bigoted and mean-spirited stance on vegetables. We’ll go live now to a peaceful protest at the local farmers market, where vegetable lovers are burning and torching a produce stand. They agree that the destruction of the vegetables is Weaver’s fault.”
“Internationally, looting broke out after several farm trucks were burned and a grocery store destroyed by vegetable rights protestors inflamed by Weaver’s remarks about okra. We’ll hear from one of them now.”
“Well, I, uh, I’m not sure what a okra is, but I want free college, and this guy is keeping us from having it. Listen, do you know how to work the newest IPhone? I want to take a selfie. I’m hashtagging my part to stop hatred.”
Ridiculous? Sure.
But so are feelings that can be so easily hurt, simply because someone doesn’t agree about a man’s duty to his family – or because he doesn’t like okra.
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